Readers of this column might recall that I enjoy asking the same question during the build up to a Yom Tov. How do we know that had we been there at the time we would be on the winning side? This is true of Pesach, Purim and Chanukah. We imagine ourselves to be frum ehrliche Yidden. We wear the correct uniform, daven in the acceptable shul/shteible, pepper our language with Aramaic, loshon Ha’koidesh and Yiddish, so it would seem to be an inappropriate question to ask, especially for readers of this paper. However, before you roll your eyes and move on to another article, just think for a moment. What really counts in Yiddishkeit? The only answer is Kovod Shomyaim, bringing honour to Hashem. This is true whether we engage in mitzvos bein odom lemokom or bein odom la’chaveiro. The moment we find ourselves doing something because we enjoy it, receive social kudos, or because it’s the only way to get our children into a school or to close a shidduch we are not on the winning side of the chanuka story. The Maccabees fought for the honour of Hashem.
The Mesilas Yeshorim teaches in a very long section detailing the midda of Chasidus/Saintliness, about the importance of asking ourselves how our behaviour will give nachas to Hashem. If we ask this question then many of the excuses we might be tempted to make, or the justifications we give will not be acceptable.
If you’ve caught yourself or someone else saying: “well everyone does it, this is just the way it is, don’t speak up it will not look good, what will the neighbours says, just don’t get caught, once I get engaged I can do things differently, then I will get a smartphone” then you’ve been on the loosing side in the Chanukah story. Select any of these claims and place the words in the minds of those who fought to keep Yiddishkeit going in the Chanukah story and Chanukah never happens. When we care more about ourselves than Hashem and the Torah, there is no Chanukah.
2000 years ago, the social pressure to assimilate and to blend in with the masses, was very real. Without being there we really have no way of knowing what side we would have been on, other than contemplating how we live today and what motivates our performance of Torah and Mitzvos. Do we live to give Hashem Nachas? Rav Avigdor Miller teaches that giving Hashem nachas happens when we bring honour to Hashem.
“Yi’hee chevoid Hashem l’oilam, yismach Hashem b’ma’asov.” The Torah tells us that Hashem does have nachas from our deeds. Yismach Hashem bi’ma’asav.” It’s very important to act with this in mind. When you do something, you should say, “I’m doing this to make a nachas ru’ach for Hashem.” If this seems forced unnatural please don’t worry. It’s easyish, whenever you do something, you should say, “I’m doing this to make Hakodosh Boruch Hu happy.” It’s important to express it aloud, so that you hear yourself saying it. Rav Avigdor Miller concludes by saying that “Hashem is happy with us when we do His will, “Yismach Hashem bi’ma’asav.” According to the Rambam a person honours Hashem by thinking about Hashem. The more you think about Hashem, the more you are honouring Hashem. A person must train himself to think about this all the time. And when you think about Hashem and honour Him, then “yismach Hashem bi’ma’asav.” We must feel, an actual feeling, that Hakodosh Boruch Hu is rejoicing when He sees His children doing the things that they are supposed to be doing.
The light of Chanukah drives away not only the deep winter darkness but the emotional and intellectual darkness many find themselves in. Rebbe Nachman teaches that we should “know the darkness itself contains many openings from which to exit. As our Sages taught: When someone comes to defile himself there are many openings for him.”
Here Rebbe Nachman puts a different spin on the regular reading of the Gemoro. We normally understand it to mean that Hashem allows a person to self-destruct if that’s what they want. However, Rebbe Nachman understands the many openings not as more negative paths, but many ways to get away from negativity. He continues “We see that even in the darkness there are many openings through which to leave. The problem is that the person [caught up in the darkness] is blind and does not know how to find the opening. A person merits finding the openings through truth. For the main light that illuminates [the openings] is Hashem, as is written in Tehilim “Hashem ori v’yishi.”
So, how does it go wrong, how do we break the connection to Hashem? “Through falsehood, a person dismisses Hashem. Through falsehood one removes himself from Hashem. Through truth, on the other hand, Hashem dwells with him, as in korov Hashem l’kol korav. When Hashem is with a person, He enlightens him on how to get out of the darkness … everything depends on the degree of truth a person has. For the main light is Hashem, and Hashem is the essence of truth. Hashem’s primary yearning is for nothing but the truth.”
Lacking Emunah causes us to get things wrong. When we don’t accept that everything is governed by Hashem we create our own false narratives. At this point we look to other sources of good and satisfaction, imagining that we will feel better, get the buzz a different way. So maybe we feel good when others think of us positively, or when we look the part or give the impression that we are looking the part. And so, our Yiddishkeit starts to fall apart very subtly. We stop thinking about giving Hashem nachas and instead worry or obsess over our social status and impressing others. The inner truth has gone and we find ourselves assimilating without ever really knowing we are doing it. This is the truth of the light of Chanukah. Knowing this connects us with those brave fighters who would not accept being told that they could not practice the Torah and the Kohanim who searched for oil, when giving up would have been easier. Look at those candles and see in their light the truth of all that we truly treasure, doing so will give you and your loved ones, the gift of Chanuka.
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